By: Dani Kolsrud, Mental Health Rep.

When we acknowledge that one-half of all US adults will deal directly, themselves, with some form of mental illness in their lifetime, it is only fitting there is a month designated to its observance.  That month is May. The reason for this designation is to encourage us to read, listen, educate, show compassion and understanding, and through these processes remove the stigma associated with mental illness. Did you know only 80 percent of people with mental illness seek or receive any help or treatment. Did you know mental illness is a large contributor to the 800,000 plus people that die every year from suicide. One in five youth ages 13-18 will struggle with some form of mental illness.  We need to improve these statistics. Needless to say, combating mental illness is a 12-month challenge!

Several years-ago, after reading some case studies related to mental health, I was inspired to do some research and start writing some notes on loneliness. Loneliness does not come under the category of a scientific term for most of us. In fact, I read that the word “loneliness” didn’t really become a part of our English language until the sixteenth century. Basically, we think of someone dealing with loneliness as being alone. Delving into aspects of loneliness, however, we learn that is not necessarily true.  You can be lonely in a relationship, lonely surrounded by family, and lonely in a crowd.

Obviously, not possessing any mystic powers allowing me to see into the future, when I began my sketch on loneliness for a mental health article, I certainly did not anticipate a COVID-19 pandemic! Words like isolation, quarantine, and phrases like home-bound, stay in, social distancing, and 6ft spacing were definitely not in my notes, but are now common in every newscast.  As a result, mental health discussions are becoming prevalent.  Numbers to call and websites to use are available, along with encouraging words on how it is ok (and expected) that there will be some mental health issues to deal with, in lieu of all that is happening on a daily basis.

Do we categorize loneliness as a mental illness?  No, not yet.  But on the other hand, we see it as a dominating factor in so many conditions related to mental health — addiction, anxiety, paranoia, depression, and low self-esteem.  It seems, in so many case studies, there is a reluctance to admit loneliness.  We don’t like to say, “I am lonely.” This hints at the presence of a stigma — should we be ashamed to be lonely?  A myriad of circumstances contributes to loneliness.  An inability to share or express, an inability to reach out to people around you are two contributors.  We label people “introverts” very loosely;  some people are introverts — being alone is the state where they are most comfortable and function most effectively; being surrounded with people is not their choice in most instances.  However, we are by nature, social creatures so you can readily see some conflicts for an introvert.  For all of us there is, or will be, that time when being alone will not be physically or emotionally feasible.  Aging, illnesses, and needs of those around us that require interaction, will cause conflict and stress for the introvert.  A quote from Oprah Winfrey fits this situation: “Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.”

I would like to recommend a book that just came out the last week of April, “Together.” It is written by Vivek H. Murthy, MD, the 19th Surgeon General of the United States.  He wrote the book long before the pandemic began, but I found so many studies and ideas applicable to our present-day challenges.  A quote from the book:

 “Government has an important role to play in combating loneliness by understanding and optimizing the impact of policies on human connection, by funding research into the causes of loneliness and by creating a public vision, strategy, and coalitions to address it.” (Murthy, 2020, Pg.240)

A reassuring reminder that has been prevalent in our Live-streaming sermons is the fact that we are not ever facing anything alone, God is always with us. We are alone with God. We are “Alone Together.”